This Week in Guidance

 

I'd like to take this time to thank all of our students and their parents for helping the puppets solve their problems. The children are learning some great life skills that will help them for a life time. Because last week was a short week I will be doing the lesson on being afraid (see previous entry below on Nov. 24th) with Mrs. Rucker's, Mrs. Keys's, and Mrs. Ricks's classes. This week in Mrs. Meason's and Mrs. Meraz's classes we will be focusing on the feeling of anger. Anger is a normal feeling that everyone experiences at some point in their lives. How we respond to anger, however, is typically learned by observing those around us. In other words, children learn by watching (parents, siblings, T.V., videos, etc.) how others respond to anger provoking situations. One way you can help your child with this skill is to teach them to recognize when they are feeling angry and to label the emotion. For example, if you see that your child is becoming angry because he/she didn't get to buy a toy while at Wal-Mart, you might say "You really feel angry that you can't have that toy." Then you can help them learn how to cope with the feeling by saying "When I feel angry I feel better when..." (I talk about it/think of something else/take a few deep breaths/read a book/do something else/count to 10/sing my favorite song/play outside/draw or color a picture/squeeze some Play-Doh/go somewhere quiet etc.). Once you acknowledge the feeling, if your child continues to whine or cry, you should try to ignore the behavior and periodically continue to acknowledge their feelings. You may need to set a limit with your child if the behavior continues or escalates by offering a choice for example, you could say "If you choose to continue to cry, then you choose to give up (watching a favorite T.V. show; playing a favorite game, etc.)" and "If you choose to calm down and take your breaths, then you  choose to watch your show tonight".  It is important to know that when you state your choices you have to consider your child's age and ensure that the choice is developmentally appropriate. It would be inappropriate to say that a 2, 3, 4 or 5-year-old could not watch T.V. for the entire day, or for a few days. For them, that is an eternity! It is also important to help children learn the physical cues associated with anger by stating "Your face is really red; I bet your heart is beating really fast; You have an angry face" etc. All of these interventions will help your child learn to identify and appropriately cope with their emotions. If you would like further information regarding this topic please let me know. I also have a video "Choices, Cookies & Kids: How to teach your child Self-Control & Self-Discipline" by Dr. Garry Landreth that you can view at school to learn more about how to set limits with your child. Please watch the puppet show under the tab "Puppet Scenarios" with your child and ask him or her to share what they learned from this week's lesson. You may type a comment from your child in response to the puppet's problem. This will provide the perfect opportunity for you to address the topic with your child. Once your child identifies strategies that can be used, you can reinforce the strategies by encouraging your child to try them when they are angry.